MODERN WOMAN

                                                           

Mary Sibanda (32) has been married to Brian Ndlovu for the past 12 years and they have two daughters. Mary is a house-wife and often feels inferior when she goes out with her working class girlfriends.

But instead of just wallowing in her insecurities and resigning herself to a life of forever wilting like a flower in the September heat when in the company of her friends, Mary has now decided to go back to school and better herself.

She is now attending night school and is preparing to re-write all the subjects that she did not pass when she sat for her O’Level examinations back in secondary school.

And ever since she went back to school her daughters’ school work has greatly improved as she is now able to assist with their school work.

As a young girl, Mary’s aspirations revolved around growing up and getting married and settling down to raise her kids just like her mother had done with her and her siblings.

Her wishes did come through as by the time she turned 20 she got married and two lovely baby girls followed soon after that.

 But while her mother could afford to be a stay at home mom while her father provided for the family, the reality is that in Mary and Brian’s case their finances never seem to balance.

By going back to school it is clear that it has since dawned on Mary that during these days of financial uncertainty there is more to life than getting married and having babies as a family can find it hard to make ends meet with just one salary.

SO! like, our mothers and grandmothers grew up at a time where all you had to do was go to school, learn how to cook and clean the house. And if you were blessed enough to get someone to ask for your hand in marriage then you were the envy of the other girls. Well that time has come and gone, we thank the good Lord for that, no disrespect to our mothers but times have changed, the modern woman to me is no longer the same woman she was during their time.

Women nowadays have to master the art of multi-tasking to survive in a man’s world. We should strive to be better than our mothers, to be more accomplished and avoid all the wrong turns that they took, follow in their footsteps but at the same time make them finer prints.

 And I am so happy because this year I have seen a lot of ladies getting JOBS, going back to school and getting their careers in order. In my own suburb I know quite a number of  ladies who went back to school and passed their O’Levels and now they are at colleges and doing great.

What I have noticed is that this pursuit of a better life and a career has brought us ladies together, helping each other out with school work and life problems in general.  That sisterhood whereby there isn’t no time for gossiping, people are busy helping each other out with getting their act together. Remember those days when our moms would wake up early to sweep the yard and while they were at it they would find some time to exchange the latest township gossip? Well those days are long gone (thank God for that).

I recently saw a quote by the director of Google Eric Schmidt that says; ”find a way to say yes to things, say yes to invitations, to meet new friends”.

Schmidt says it’s how you get a new job, or even your spouse. This is very true child! Please don’t complain about men shortage when you always cooped up in your house. Surround yourself with strong, successful women and believe me they will push you to do something great about your life.

The pull her down syndrome should not exist in your world. If you see someone succeeding do not hate but look closely and try to see what they are doing right and aspire to be better yourself.

 An idle mind is the devil’s workshop and sociology tells us that the environment that we grew up in shaped who we are today.

So pause and ask yourself what kind of example are you setting for your kids and those of close family and friends?

 You might not know it but there probably is a girl who looks up to you, who is watching your every move and copying what you doing. Think about it, growing up was there no girl whom you looked up to and admired from a distance? Be it because of the way she dressed or the way she walked or the way she carried herself?

We need more girls who run the world, girls who will grow up to be leaders and wonderful wives and mums.

I would like to believe that the modern man does not want to marry a wife to whom getting married is the pinnacle of her aspirations.

As a result I always tell any young girl who cares to listen that they should excel in their studies as that will provide the springboard for them to excel in life.

 Education is EVERYTHING!!! And no-one can take that away from you.

So ladies, wake up every morning with an attitude to do better than yesterday, and strive to be an even greater person tomorrow.

And remember ladies, its 20-FIX-IT!!!! Go ahead and fix it ladies don’t get left behind; come December we will reflect and say 20-FIXED!!!!

God Is Love

Emma

(pic courtesy online)